Fearless
I am currently reading "Fearless" by Max Lucado. When I first started it I wasn't very interested and it was hard to get into. I picked it up again today and began reading where I left off. Wow. It's really good! It was definitely a God thing that I started reading it again tonight, because some of the circumstances going on in my life warrant what I've read. I would definitely recommend it to anyone. =) I wanted to share one particular part that stood out to me. I stopped reading when I saw it because I didn't want to continue on and then forget it. It's a quote by Chrysostom.
"He was the archbishop of Constantinople from AD 398 to 404. He gained a following by his eloquent criticisms of the wealthy and powerful. Twice banished by authorities, he once asked: 'What can I fear? Will it be death? But you know that Christ is my life, and that I shall gain by death. Will it be exile? But the earth and all its fullness is the Lord's. Will it be loss of wealth? But we have brought nothing into the world, and can carry nothing out. Thus all the terrors of the world are contemptible in my eyes; and I smile at all its good things. Poverty I do not fear; riches I do not sigh for. Death I do no shrink from.'"
When I read that paragraph, I thought, "Wow, that is what I want my heart's cry to be."
I have been realizing some things about myself lately. One if which is that for all of my maturity I am still terribly immature. I am selfish. I don't handle confrontation well AT ALL. I could go on but it would just become a pity fest so I won't. In addition to these things about myself, the Lord has been showing me that I've been running away from allowing him to change these things in me. I read my Bible, talk about the Lord, and I want to be like Him, but I haven't spent a lot of time just WITH Him. Simple, unfettered, time with my Lord. I talk a lot, and my desire to be more and more like the Lord is sincere, but I have sometimes failed to realize the huge amount of dedication that being recklessly abandoned for the Lord takes. I don't care what people say about following God being easy, it's not. It's hard!! It's almost a constant struggle. Sometimes are easier than others, but it's never easy. It is so worth it though. I can't even begin to describe how worth it, it truly is.
Earlier in the book I mentioned above, Max Lucado talks about how he used to sit in his dad's lap and "help" drive the truck. He talked about how although he could barely see over the dashboard he was never afraid because his father was in control. I stopped for a minute when I read that and thought, what if he made a wrong turn because he couldn't see? Well of course his father would grab the steering wheel and keep the truck on course. I then pictured myself in that situation and realized that if I was the child in daddy's lap, when I made a mistake like that, my instinct would definitely not be to let go of the steering wheel to let my father correct my steering mishap. I would most likely grab onto the wheel more fiercely than before, trying to correct the problem myself. The problem with that is the I'm too short to see over the dashboard so how silly am I to think that I can fix it myself? And even though my daddy is much stronger than me, if I still have my hands on the wheel when he's trying to correct the problem, he's not going to be able to right the truck like he could if I were to let go of the steering wheel. Hm.. of course I saw the spiritual connection as soon as I thought that. In life, when I make a mistake, my instinct is to focus more on the issue at hand and try to fix it myself. Most people would probably do the same thing. Unfortunately we can't see the big picture. We're too small. If I would just let go of the steering wheel so the my heavenly Father could right my course, my journey would be much less bumpy! Funny though, how the thought of letting go of the reigns sort of speak terrifies me so.
I'm going to get back to reading now; I just wanted to share that one part of the book. =) Toodles!
-Jessie
"He was the archbishop of Constantinople from AD 398 to 404. He gained a following by his eloquent criticisms of the wealthy and powerful. Twice banished by authorities, he once asked: 'What can I fear? Will it be death? But you know that Christ is my life, and that I shall gain by death. Will it be exile? But the earth and all its fullness is the Lord's. Will it be loss of wealth? But we have brought nothing into the world, and can carry nothing out. Thus all the terrors of the world are contemptible in my eyes; and I smile at all its good things. Poverty I do not fear; riches I do not sigh for. Death I do no shrink from.'"
When I read that paragraph, I thought, "Wow, that is what I want my heart's cry to be."
I have been realizing some things about myself lately. One if which is that for all of my maturity I am still terribly immature. I am selfish. I don't handle confrontation well AT ALL. I could go on but it would just become a pity fest so I won't. In addition to these things about myself, the Lord has been showing me that I've been running away from allowing him to change these things in me. I read my Bible, talk about the Lord, and I want to be like Him, but I haven't spent a lot of time just WITH Him. Simple, unfettered, time with my Lord. I talk a lot, and my desire to be more and more like the Lord is sincere, but I have sometimes failed to realize the huge amount of dedication that being recklessly abandoned for the Lord takes. I don't care what people say about following God being easy, it's not. It's hard!! It's almost a constant struggle. Sometimes are easier than others, but it's never easy. It is so worth it though. I can't even begin to describe how worth it, it truly is.
Earlier in the book I mentioned above, Max Lucado talks about how he used to sit in his dad's lap and "help" drive the truck. He talked about how although he could barely see over the dashboard he was never afraid because his father was in control. I stopped for a minute when I read that and thought, what if he made a wrong turn because he couldn't see? Well of course his father would grab the steering wheel and keep the truck on course. I then pictured myself in that situation and realized that if I was the child in daddy's lap, when I made a mistake like that, my instinct would definitely not be to let go of the steering wheel to let my father correct my steering mishap. I would most likely grab onto the wheel more fiercely than before, trying to correct the problem myself. The problem with that is the I'm too short to see over the dashboard so how silly am I to think that I can fix it myself? And even though my daddy is much stronger than me, if I still have my hands on the wheel when he's trying to correct the problem, he's not going to be able to right the truck like he could if I were to let go of the steering wheel. Hm.. of course I saw the spiritual connection as soon as I thought that. In life, when I make a mistake, my instinct is to focus more on the issue at hand and try to fix it myself. Most people would probably do the same thing. Unfortunately we can't see the big picture. We're too small. If I would just let go of the steering wheel so the my heavenly Father could right my course, my journey would be much less bumpy! Funny though, how the thought of letting go of the reigns sort of speak terrifies me so.
I'm going to get back to reading now; I just wanted to share that one part of the book. =) Toodles!
-Jessie
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